Outpouring of cariño provides space for healing

Some families would arrive in the morning, some in late evening, sometimes in the middle of the night at 3 a.m. The time did not matter; staff at the Basilica of Our Lady of San Juan del Valle-National Shrine was ready to receive the immigrant children and parents who had just been reunified a few hours before at the Port Isabel Detention Center in Bayview.

With open arms and an outpouring of love, the Catholic Church in the Rio Grande Valley provided families with a safe and holy place to reconnect with each other after weeks and months of being separated.

From the first families that arrived on July 13 to the last two on July 30, more than 500 reunited families spent their first nights together, reunified on the basilica grounds.

One child said it would be the first night she would go to sleep without crying now that she was with her mother. One mother from Honduras who was reunified with her son on July 27 after 55 days of being apart did not sleep that first night. She wanted to watch her son sleep and hear his heart beat. "Mi corazón comenzó a palpitar de nuevo,” she said. (My heart began to beat again.)

She recounted the pain of her initial reunification, saying it took nearly an hour for her six-year-old son to hug her at the detention center. “No me toques,” he told her; “no te conozco. Tu me abandonaste.” (Don’t touch me. I don’t know you. You abandoned me.”)

Each child, mother, father who was thankful for their reunification carries at the same time untold traumas because of their separation. As a nation, many of us felt helpless as more than 2,000 immigrant children were separated from their parents as part of the “zero-tolerance” policy.

As soon as the reunification of families began, everyone wanted to do what they could. Here in our diocese we witnessed the Church in action during a critical time. This is an amazing moment in the history of the Church. We focused not on the politics but rather on taking care of our brothers and sisters before us.

The Church response is not new. It is ongoing. Each week since 2012, volunteers pray with children who are living in detention centers for unaccompanied minors. They sit and listen to their hopes and dreams, their prayers to be reunified with their family.  Also, other volunteers help keep the Humanitarian Respite Center in operation. To date, more than 100,000 immigrant men, women and children have found rest at the center, which first opened in 2014 at Sacred Heart Church in McAllen and is now at a temporary site nearby.

“This is a blessed moment, where we have been chosen to care for them, to welcome them, to help them beyond this point in their journey,” said Sister Norma Pimentel, of the Missionaries of Jesus, who has been overseeing the care of newly released immigrants as executive director of Catholic Charities of the Rio Grande Valley.

From the moment they arrive, it is important to welcome them and care for them, to let them know that they are safe, said Sister Pimentel, who is a licensed professional counselor. “The moment that another human being opens up their heart and their care to them begins a process of healing,” she said. “That human contact is so transformative, and that is what is happening here.”

Witnessing the Church’s response, witnessing the people who turned all their attention to helping the families, helps us to see the light of Christ shine in even the darkest of times.

Their joy was contagious as we witnessed countless embraces between children and their mothers and fathers. Their smiles and laughter gave us hope. We trust in God that that their faith will continue to guide them in the journey ahead.

As we rejoiced with families celebrating their reunions, it was joyful as well to serve. Consuelo Jones from Mission worked from early morning into the evening securing food for each meal. Socorro Ortega and her family drove to San Juan from Brownsville at 5 a.m. to cook breakfast for the families. Parishes and businesses donated meals as well. St. John the Baptist Church in San Juan hosted an outdoor picnic for the families. The youths from the parish organized games and gifts for the children. The abundance of giving from so many in our diocese translated into smiles for the children and their parents. That evening, they cried, they celebrated, they rejoiced.

An added joy, on Friday after the government’s deadline to reunite families, the six-year-old who hesitated to hug his mother at their initial reunification presented her with a yellow Esperanza flower he found after spending the morning with her. He picked it for her just as he used to pick flowers for her when they were in Honduras, she said.

To witness and be a part of this moment in history is the most blessed experience of all my years of working with the Church.

(Originally published in August 2018 edition of The Valley Catholic newspaper)

What we can do

When Wyne Cler from Denver Colorado heard volunteers were needed, she signed up, booked a flight to McAllen, and came with her 13-year-old daughter Lucy to the Humanitarian Respite Center. She did not know what she would be doing, knew her Spanish was rudimentary, but she knew she wanted to help in any way she could.

As she held and rocked a baby from Honduras in her arms so the mother could rest, Cler said “We have to do this. How can we not come?” She knows what it is like to be an immigrant. Cler was 2 1/2 years old when she came to the United States with her parents as refugees from Vietnam in 1975. “I don’t care what your politics are; we have to do the right thing,” she said.

Retirees Steve, 85, and Ruth Mohyla, 82, from Cypress, Texas also acted on the impulse to help. “We wanted to do something.” The couple drove down to the Rio Grande Valley and heard about the Humanitarian Respite Center at their hotel.

Awakened by the cries of immigrant children who have been separated from their parents, people locally and from different parts of Texas and the United States have stopped what they were doing, some taking time off from work, to take action.

We have all been impacted, shocked that this could happen in our nation, that children could be used as pawns in a deterrence measure that is cruel and unjust. Bishop Daniel E. Flores in an early statement said, “the systematic separation of immigrant parents and children at the border is simply cruel…This nation, for the sake of its soul, must learn to weep with these children, and all the children who are being instrumentalized and commodified in our midst.”

As we cry with the children who must feel lost and alone, we cannot even fathom the long-term damage this is causing them and our nation. It is heartbreaking to hear the cries of children who are calling out for their parents. The cries published by ProPublica are but a glimpse of these dark days. Dr. Amy Cohen, a child psychiatrist who came from Los Angeles and talked to some of the children and mothers, estimates that 90 percent of the people who come through the respite center door have had some type of moderate to severe trauma.

But we find hope in the midst of tragedy. We find it in each other.

A documentarian who came to the border to cover the story, asked some good questions that we see answered here by the response of hundreds, even thousands — “How is God at work in the midst of this crisis? And how can we see that and participate?”

We see it every day. Because of our humanity, we look for ways to help a brother and sister in need. For four years volunteers have helped to keep the Humanitarian Respite Center open. To date, more than 100,000 immigrant men, women and children have found rest at the center, which first opened at Sacred Heart Church in McAllen and is now at a temporary site nearby. Sister Norma Pimentel, with the Missionaries of Jesus, who oversees the work of the respite center as executive director of Catholic Charities of the Rio Grande Valley, reminds us we are restoring people’s dignity with our simple acts of kindness — with a warm welcome, “Bienvenidos!” a warm meal, a shower, a smile. You can see the transformation occur within minutes.

While at the respite center one evening, a nine-month old baby delighted after a fussy spell when his mother fed him small pieces of carrots and potatoes from a warm bowl of soup. As she first mashed the pieces between her fingers, she told me this was his first warm meal in days. Across the room, a three-year-old boy was taking turns feeding himself and feeding his father with a spoon. Witnessing these simple moments, filled me with joy, and with a renewed energy to do more.

God is certainly at work daily through the volunteers from here in the Rio Grande Valley who help year round and from the volunteers who are coming from Los Angeles, Laredo, Dallas, Kansas City, Toledo Ohio, New York City, New Jersey and countless other locations. They all have come in response to a spontaneous desire to help in some way.

We are witnessing “an extra measure of cariños and solidarity as an expression of support” said one volunteer coordinator. This is evident in the overwhelming response from people from across the nation, via donations, prayers and volunteering.

Four years ago, when Sister Norma asked the parish priest to borrow the parish hall for a few days, no one imagined it would continue this long. The days, weeks, months ahead are filled with uncertainty in regard to the different immigration realities, but we cannot lose hope. In the words of Bishop Flores, we must continue “as a community to pray for families and children affected by this enforcement policy, and that our country’s laws be crafted and administered with human compassion.”

What we are doing, taking action with our prayers and fasting, by speaking up and contacting our leaders, by staying informed, by donating, by volunteering, is the visible reality of God at work in our midst.

Even children of all ages are doing what they can. One group of children from San Francisco sent a bundle of cards with hand drawn pictures and messages. “Sending love from San Francisco” read one written in crayons. An older child wrote, “les quería enviar un cariño mensaje de apoyo y solidaridad....Todo el país está pensando en ustedes y no les van a dejar solos.” “Eres bienvenido aquí. Estamos contigo.”

At a prayer vigil on June 20, Bishop Flores said, “We recognize that God puts us on the road that other people travel so that we might help them. That is the spirit of this walk. That God puts us really today on the road that helps to be servants of those who walk....”

A nine-year-old from Dallas, Sean Bertram, who came with his father to the respite center, served water his first day to thirsty immigrants who had just arrived. He said it was his first volunteer experience, and his best decision ever. “It’s the least I can do,” he said. His example reminds us all that we can each do something.

(Originally published in July 2018 edition of The Valley Catholic newspaper)